Sunday, September 08, 2002

"Friends"

So yesterday night and Friday night I tried out for Attention Starved Children (ASC), the improv group here at SJU. From what I saw, in my opinion, I thought that I would be a good candidate to be in this group. Friday night I thought I did quite well, I was on with most of the games, and my chemistry with some of the other people trying out seemed to be good. Last night I had some off moments, and it wasn’t one of my better performances, but I still think that I did good enough to warrant being one of the people to come back to call-backs today. ASC seemed to have different plans.

After they made their decision on who came back, I talked to Karl about it because he is already in the group. He told me I didn’t make it back, and at first I thought he was kidding because we always kid around about stuff like that. After a few seconds it dawned on me that he wasn’t and I was dumbfounded. Was I not funny enough? Did my experience with Strike Team Improv this summer do nothing for me? Am I just really bad on stage? I didn’t understand. He told me that he was the only one in the group who pushed for me to make it back to call-backs. The thing that really hurt about this is that I had another good friend from our ultimate frisbee team (I guess not as good of one as I thought) in the group who said he didn’t want me in it. That hurts to know a friend wouldn’t want you to be in it, and that he would choose someone who obviously doesn’t know the rules of improv or have any experience over me. To top it off, and to give a real pointed edge to how I feel is a situation that came up last year.

This same person who didn’t want me in improv was in charge of interviews for the Health Initiative group on campus here last year. This is a group of people who try to make the campus aware that there are alternatives to drinking and partying all the time and they try to help everyone lead a healthy life while they are here at SJU. There was one slot open with the group and there were two people vying for this opening—me and another kid he didn’t know. I thought for sure I’d get in because I had never been a person to drink or party while I’d been here and I am a huge stickler for leading a healthy lifestyle. I should have been a shoe-in. Instead he chose the other kid. I was really hurt and asked him why he wouldn’t choose me. He never answered me, instead he would dodge the question however he could. I lost some respect for him there but I got over it. I now see that even though I’ve thought he’s been a good friend, he obviously isn’t.

Now, back to present time. The leader of ASC, when coming to my name, said he basically just didn’t like me and that’s why I shouldn’t be back. Wow, that’s a great reason not to bring someone back. That’s like telling a star basketball prospect they’re cut because he isn’t friendly enough to the captain. Ludicrous.

Well, I don’t know what else to say except good luck to Karl and Pat, two actual friends who made it into the group. I hope you guys can make it a better group then the bunch of assholes it is now. I don’t plan on being nicey nice to anyone in that group anymore (except Karl and Pat, of course) as they obviously don’t give a shit about me as a person. Sometimes you have to learn the hard way who is really a friend, and who is just acting like one.

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