Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Thanksgiving = Hate?

I would have never imagined that a holiday such as Thanksgiving, a holiday focused on being thankful, could be turned into a day of pain, hurt, sadness, and uncaring. This year, thanks to the assclown that I have for an uncle, our Thanksgiving evening was turned into a nightmare after it started out as a wonderful, peaceful time for my family to spend with one another.

Before we started eating a spectacular meal of macaroni & cheese, crescent rolls, pickles, and strawberry pretzel desert, my uncle Dave on my mom's side thought he should call us. Before he called, my brothers, my parents, and myself were all having a great time snacking, talking, and simply enjoying each other's company and the calm of the holiday. In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it gets hard to find time to simply just sit and be in someone's company for an extended amount of time, and because of this we were all treasuring the moment.

As we were enjoying the evening, my uncle Dave on my mom's side thought he should call. No, wait, actually he informed us he was told to call my mother by my grandmother. When my grandma actually arrived at our place we found out that, no, actually my grandma had requested that they come down to visit with my family sometime because there have been some extended family troubles as of late. Instead of doing that, he twisted her words into a freshly formed lie and claimed that my grandma told him to call.

Now I don't really know much about what was said between my mother and my uncle on the phone, but I had to deal with the aftermath--a mother in tears wondering how her brother could be such a hateful, uncaring person. It took all of my self-restraint not to get on the phone and tell my uncle what a rotten piece of shit he was for doing something so spiteful and malicious on a holiday supposedly based upon caring and giving thanks. Apparently to him thanksgiving translates into "I'll Make My Relatives Day Really Shitty"-giving.

From what my mother and father told me, my uncle also singled me out as being a terrible person who has done nothing but cause strife for our family. By causing strife, I'm assuming he means "pointing out the truth about his character, which he doesn't like so he'll throw a hissy fit about it". I know there's a lot of details being left out here, but the main thing is, I was completely appalled at what my uncle did. If he really had the urge to be a complete jerkface to my mother, couldn't he have at least maybe waited until the holiday was over? No, of course not, because that might actually be considerate.

What also gets me is that he feels the need to slam me and put me down to other members of my family, but he lacks the cahones to actually speak to me. Am I really that intimidating? Possibly, but I doubt it. What I think it is, is that he just wants someone to talk smack about without actually having to talk to him.

To complicate matters, my uncle is my Godparent... well, at least he used to be. I've stopped thinking of him in that light. You don't talk shit about your Godson and tell your relatives that you never want to see him again. No, my uncle in no longer a Godparent to me. He's simply a judgmental ass who makes his judgments based only on assumptions, half-truths, and his own biases without taking into account how it affects anyone outside of himself.

I really hate knowing that I'm related to someone who is like this, and who is setting a horrible example for his own children, but it's one of the cards I've been dealt. Seeing how this card really has no place in my hand, I choose to discard it. Maybe I'll pick up something better the next time it's my turn to draw.

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