Wednesday, September 04, 2002

Oh, How I Felt Alive

I can definitely tell now, after a week of being up here, that I’m back at SJU. The reason I know is not because of homework, my friends, or where I live—but feeling that I get being surrounded by the nature of this campus. In the past couple of days I have been just hit with some extremely passionate feelings about nature, beauty, and its small relationship to me.

The first big hit came a couple of days ago. I had just gotten finished with class for the day and I was walking back to my room to rest, relax, and play some UT if I had time. As I was making the turn towards the tundra, I was just assaulted by a spectacular image in my mind. Up above me in the sky was an overcast sky. The clouds were rolling and billowing across the tops of the trees and over my apartment building. The mindless shapes—spectacular. The clouds were the type that they weren’t quite storm clouds, but yet they were also not benign. As they fleeted across the sky, the wind came with them. Being accustomed to the warm heat of the last few days, the cool breeze, in combination with the slightly lower temperature, gave me a little chill—not a bad chill, just one of recognition. As I swayed with the breeze, so did the trees lining the sidewalk and in the forest. It is such a beautiful movement to watch as the trees sway forward with the wind and then bend back as the breeze subsides, only to pick back up again and rustle the leaves of the trees. Below the trees was so much green—new grass and undergrowth where last year, as I had left this campus, there wasn’t much there but mud. The picture could not be complete without the sounds associated with all of this. You cold hear the breeze, the moving of the leaves of the trees, and the creak of the branches. They combined into a minor symphony written by God’s hand. As soon as all of this hit me, a moment later the feeling was gone. All of the elements were still there, but the symphony had come to its close. That perfect combination of God’s creations made me, once again, realize how wonderful this life, and where we live it, really is.

The second time came as I was walking Theresa to the bus after she had come over to play some Dance Dance Revolution. The same feeling as described above just hit me hard as I was walking back to my apartment. It was short and fast, but had an impact nonetheless. I wish I could describe in better words what I mean, but that’s the problem with words—you usually can’t say what you really want to.

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