Tuesday, March 11, 2003

Mullet Abuse

The things you can find at a local Target are simply amazing. Yesterday I went into St. Cloud after my classes to pick up some cold medicine. I wasn’t feeling very well when I woke up yesterday so I needed some drugs to make me all good again. I really hate head colds as they really don’t serve a purpose in the whole scheme of disease and sickness. They aren’t bad enough to really get you out of going to class or work since all you really have is a stuffy nose, a light cough, and (for me) sore eyes. It’s also not weak enough to just blow off as if you were not sick at all. This little section on the range of disease that head colds occupy is the section of mild annoyance and I was very mildly annoyed.

I went in to Target and got my cold medicine right away, but I really didn’t feel like leaving right away so I decided to just have a look around for a while and waste some time. I moseyed on back to the electronics section to see if they had any cheap dvds that I might want, but they didn’t. However, as I was looking at Xbox games I walked around the back of one of the isles and found that they had Xbox controllers on clearance for $6. Only $6!!! Not only was it a controller, but it was a controller package. It came with a controller, a cd laser lens cleaner and extension cables, all for one extremely cheap price. I couldn’t pass up such a deal as that so I grabbed one and went along on my merry little way.

As I was coming up to the checkout I saw a couple, probably in their early 30’s, maybe their late 20’s, pushing a cart towards the checkout. The reason this couple stood out is because the husband had a monstrously large mullet. It wasn’t just a normal mullet either, it was one of those mullets that are caused by balding. The front of his head had balded and he had let all of the rest of his hair grown into a mullet that reached down to the middle of his back. I was horribly disturbed by this image, but it managed to get worse—grotesquely worse. The mother called out for her child to come out of the clothes section because they were checking out. Along came running a little six or seven year old. The sight of this child made me want to cry. The parents had shaved the child’s head……all except the hair in the back that formed a mullet almost as long as his father’s. Why, oh why, would you torture your child like that? Isn’t there a law against child abuse? I wanted to go grab an electric razor from the men’s hygiene department and just shave that monstrosity off of this innocent child’s head. The rest of the day I was haunted by that poor child’s face and haircut.

After I had somewhat recovered from my mullet encounter I headed back home. I had a volleyball game at St. Ben’s that I had to be at. Our team looked pretty bad last night. I was still sick (the cold medicine didn’t do a whole lot for me), Casey had had his wisdom teeth out so he was in a drug-induced haze, and the rest of our team had just gotten off of a long spring break. We looked so rusty in our first game and ended up losing, but luckily for us we regained some of our composure and won the next two. We still didn’t look that good in our last two games—our sets were not at the net, our passes were low, and our spikes weren’t landing where we wanted—but we did manage to do just well enough to come out ahead.

Now today promises to be a long one. I have two classes, a bunch homework to do, paperwork to fill out for my job, a paper to finish for night class, and then my night class followed by my Tuesday night volleyball game. Wow, and that’s all ahead of me yet……

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