Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Smart Kid

Elementary, middle, and most of high school was hellish for me. I'm sure everyone feels that way, even the popular kids, but in my attempt to win at the "who's got it worse" game, I will assert that I was one of the worst off kids in early high school. End of story.

There were many factors that led to my being a social pariah, a couple that I couldn't really help. God had decided to curse me with child leprosy, or more modernly known as acne. I had it pretty bad and not just on my face. I would also get big, honkin' zits on my chest and back. It was like I perpetually had chicken pox, except you could squeeze each pox and you'd get a nice, juicy present.

Besides have acne, I was the class nerd. I did my homework and I did it well. I rarely got anything wrong on tests or quizzes. I would ask questions during class (which was always a big no-no). I also never studied, which pissed every other kid off because they'd work hard and not do as well. I was eventually nicknamed "Sponge" because of my ability to just soak up what we did in class. Oh, just so you know, it wasn't one of those cute nicknames, it was a pejorative term.

I was also overweight up until about 10th grade, which everyone knows doesn't help your social standing in high school. You got a fat joke to tell me, I heard it. You know a fat kid name, I was called it. It was terrible. Thank God for cross country and track, as that one-two punch leaned me up real quick.

Finally, I lived on a farm, which you wouldn't think would necessarily be a bad thing, but since we raised hogs on our farm, there were many insults about bestiality and doing the nasty with the pigs thrown my way.

So, anyhow, where I am I going with this? Well, it's all a lead up to the cartoon below that captures perfectly what I always wanted to do to all of those popular kids. Oh, how I hated them and wished all the worst on them. If it wouldn't have been for the good morals my parents instilled in me, who knows if I would have turned out like the kid below or not.




Thanks, Mike, for finding drawing these images.

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