Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Starbucks Theme Song

Good God, why? Please, someone tell me how this happened. Who in their right mind approved the funding of creating this utter tripe? Listen for yourself to the atrocious Starbucks theme song, which apes "We Built this City" by Starship, arguably one of the worst songs ever recorded in the history of rock music... right up there with anything by Styx or Journey.

I was simply appalled as I listened through it. The lyrics are hideous, but what corporate theme song has good lyrics? The music is a crappy copy of a crappy song. The singing isn't really that great. The sound clip about 3/4 of the way through the song, though, that's that clincher. Un-frickin-believable in it's cheesy badness.

In listening to the Starbucks theme song, I was reminded of the KPMG theme song I heard a little while back. After searching, I found it online to listen to here. It is also quite atrocious, and oddly has three remixes--the jungle mix, the hard rock mix, and the teutonic master mix. If you can listen to them all, and then listen to yet ANOTHER KPMG corporate song, entitled "Power of One" and found here (with a remixed children's choir version here), and not want to lose your hearing forever, then you are a better person than I.

God, after listening to all of these, I think I need to go vomit... nope, I know I need to, be right back...

*runs to bathroom*
*locks door and puts up toilet seat*
*gets on knees*
*wipes off mouth*
*flushes toilet*
*returns to computer*

Ahh, I feel so much better now.

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